My first job was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned ... couldn't concentrate. Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so ...they gave me the ax. After that I tried to be a tailor, but I just wasn't suited for it. Mainly because ...it was a so-so job. Next I tried working in a muffler factory, but that ...was exhausting. I wanted to be a barber, but ...I just couldn't cut it. Then I tried to be a chef -- figured it would add a little spice to my life, but I just ...didn't have the thyme. I attempted to be a deli worker, but any way I sliced it, I... couldn't cut the mustard. My best job was being a musician, but eventually I found ...I wasn't noteworthy. I studied a long time to become a doctor, but I...didn't have any patients. Next was a job in a shoe factory; I tried but I ...just didn't fit in. I became a professional fisherman, but discovered that I ...couldn't live on my net income. I would not be a witch, even for a spell. I managed to get a good job working for a pool-maintenance company, but the work was ...just too draining. I got a job at a zoo feeding giraffes, but I was fired because I ...wasn't up to it. So then I got a job in a fitness-center, but they said I ...wasn't fit for the job. Next, I found being an electrician interesting, but the work was shocking and I ...was discharged. After many years of trying to find steady work I finally got a job as a historian until I realized there was ...no future in it. My last job was working at Starbucks, but I had to quit because it ...was always the same old grind.